callistahogan: (Default)
callistahogan ([personal profile] callistahogan) wrote2009-10-08 02:35 pm

LJ Idol: Week 0 - Introduction

Compared to most people in this competition, I have had very little life experience. I am a teenager, not yet halfway through my high school career. I have only been outside my home state once and that was when I was much too young to remember it. I have lived a very sheltered Christian life. Most of my time I spend holed up in my room, reading novels, surfing the Web, and contemplating the sad state of the world today.

There is not much I can tell you about my past, because to be honest it is a lot like my present. Sure, I am a little older, a little wiser, but I am still just a girl. I am a girl who is trying to find her place in this world, and a girl who finds it increasingly difficult to do so. I read to escape to a different world -- just as I did at eight or nine, when I read the Harry Potter books for the first time. I write to express myself, to show the parts of myself that I often do not let anyone else see. I yearn to show the world what I have to offer, and to show people that I am so much more than a stereotypical teenager.

I am proud to call myself an Independent. As you will see if you read my journal with any regularity, I used to be a Republican, but after seeing the pointlessness of the whole Republican/Democrat war, being an Independent seemed like the choice to make. That doesn't mean I am not a strong Christian, with strong Christian morals, because I am. It simply means that I prefer to form my own opinions, without worrying what either party is saying. I don't want to feel pigeonholed into believing this is the solution to that, or that this is the only solution to that other thing.

Perhaps the most important thing you need to know about me is that I am a writer.

First and foremost, my goal in life is to be an author. Not necessarily a published author, although that would be nice. I just want people to read something I have written and feel something, whether it be sorrow, joy, or maybe even confusion. If just one person looks at what I've written and is touched by it, then in my mind, writing a hundred stories to get to that one touching moment is worth it. Writing is the way I show people who I am, and without it, I wouldn't be where I am today.

I have been writing since I was about six years old. It suppose it all started in first grade, when I learned to read (or when my teachers first started teaching us how to read, that is; I was probably reading before then). I remember wanting to write, although I wasn't sure how at the time. My first story, which was written in second grade, was entitled "A Sour Skittle Story" and underwent several alterations as time went on. It was never finished, and for a while, writing was on the back burner until I started writing fanfiction. Bam, the passion was back.

That was six years ago.

I have been writing for more than half my life.

Perhaps that's why I entered this competition in the first place. I am a writer who yearns to tell people who I am, and what better way to do that than being in a competition of this magnitude? 

I want to tell people about standing on a picnic table in front of my apartment when I was three or four after my family's washing machine broke. I want to tell people about sleeping in my own room in first grade, with the bugs attached to the window and the cockroach I found on my blanket that one night. I want to tell people about taking speech lessons in third grade, and being disappointed in fourth when my teacher didn't seem to like me. I want to tell people about fifth grade when I met my best friend, and sixth grade when I truly became friends with her. I want to tell people about seventh grade, when I spent a whole month researching creationism and evolution and writing down page after page after page of Internet articles. I want to tell them about my experiences in English classes over the years, and how my teachers have -- in one form or another -- showed me what I have to do to fulfill my dream.

To be honest, I just want to tell people the fact that I am a fifteen-year-old Christian Independent girl who has dreams too big for her heart, and a heart too big for her mind.

[identity profile] callistahogan.livejournal.com 2009-10-10 01:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks! :) I already have a strong sense that I am going to love being a part of this community.

[identity profile] callistahogan.livejournal.com 2009-10-10 01:54 pm (UTC)(link)
Aw, thank you! Good luck to you too!

[identity profile] viagra.livejournal.com 2009-10-10 03:30 pm (UTC)(link)
It was exciting to read this; you remind me a lot of myself. I have been writing for as long as I can remember (I even received the "Story of the Month" honor several times in elementary school; though I don't really remember us writing stories so often that every month a story would be picked to be shared with the school). I look forward to reading more of your stuff, and I imagine that you'll go quite far.

[identity profile] callistahogan.livejournal.com 2009-10-10 04:05 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you so much! I certainly hope to go far! :D

[identity profile] jenandbronze.livejournal.com 2009-10-10 04:17 pm (UTC)(link)
American Sign Language.

[identity profile] java-fiend.livejournal.com 2009-10-10 05:08 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't think any dreams can ever be too big for your heart... Goethe said, "Dream no small dreams for they have no power to move the hearts of men." And I think that's true. Dream big, your heart can take it. :-)

Very moving entry. Thanks for sharing. I'll most definitely look reading more of your entries. :-)

[identity profile] norda.livejournal.com 2009-10-10 10:29 pm (UTC)(link)
I want to hear your stories.

:::pulls up a beanbag chair and settles in:::

Previous participant last year, reading and voting this season.

[identity profile] brightflashes.livejournal.com 2009-10-11 06:06 pm (UTC)(link)
Okay I have instant respect for you. Age is just a number. Your introduction entry just drips with talent, a sensitivity to voice and organization, and had you not said what your age was, I'd have assumed you were in your thirties. So you'll be thirty in my mind every time I read your entries this season (not a bad thing).

Totally rooting for you and looking forward a great deal to your entries this season. Good luck! : )

[identity profile] comedychick.livejournal.com 2009-10-11 06:24 pm (UTC)(link)
I really admire anyone who chooses to make their own mind up about Stuff. I think it's great that you're one of those!

Your cockroach story...which isn't so much a story yet... reminds me of the time I dreamed I was scrunching something in my hand, and as I slowly woke, I continued to do so, and when I was awake, I realised I was ACTUALLY scrunching a giant cockroach in my hand! It was so gross. I think I might've been a bit older than you are now when that happened.

[identity profile] soundscool1.livejournal.com 2009-10-11 06:43 pm (UTC)(link)
I'll say you come off as a very impressive fifteen year old, and it's clear that you've been writing for some time - that writing is in your blood.

Can't wait to read what you have to share :)

[identity profile] thndrstd.livejournal.com 2009-10-11 07:12 pm (UTC)(link)
Welcome to the competition. I look forward to your words. I enjoy reading the writing of the younger folks in the competition as they evolve and learn and have experiences that remind me of some in my past.

Good luck to you.

[identity profile] callistahogan.livejournal.com 2009-10-11 10:58 pm (UTC)(link)
That is a very good point. I suppose I could have said I had dreams too big for my mind. But sometimes I feel as though my dreams are way too big for anything, let alone my heart, so it does fit. Even though sometimes I feel nothing is too big for my heart. :D

Thank you!

[identity profile] callistahogan.livejournal.com 2009-10-11 10:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you. I hope to have a chance to tell some of them!

[identity profile] sra33.livejournal.com 2009-10-11 11:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Wise beyond your years. :) I'm 24 and I don't have your sort of perspective. Good luck! :)

[identity profile] sra33.livejournal.com 2009-10-11 11:31 pm (UTC)(link)
OMG GROSS GROSS GROSS AHHH...

I had a dream once that there was spiders everywhere and I woke up to one crawling down my leg. x.x

[identity profile] java-fiend.livejournal.com 2009-10-11 11:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Absolutely nothing is too big for your mind or your heart. :-)

[identity profile] elderwoodpixie.livejournal.com 2009-10-12 12:03 am (UTC)(link)
You're never too young to pursue your dreams and talent knows no age barriers. You are very lucky to already have a firm hold on both! Looking forward to reading more from you.

Re: Previous participant last year, reading and voting this season.

[identity profile] callistahogan.livejournal.com 2009-10-12 12:20 am (UTC)(link)
*blush* Thank you so much! Good luck reading and voting; there are an awful lot of entries this year. And it means a lot to me, knowing that you think so highly of my writing. It's so strange, getting all these compliments! :D

[identity profile] comedychick.livejournal.com 2009-10-12 12:21 am (UTC)(link)
I KNOW! I was very freaked out after that!

I think it's mean of our brains to warn us of those things with dreams. I think I'd have preferred to have been oblivious about it!

[identity profile] oldscratchx.livejournal.com 2009-10-12 12:55 am (UTC)(link)
Hello, nice to meet you. Everyone at any point in their path has something to say. So, looking forward to your take on everything. -Nick

[identity profile] callistahogan.livejournal.com 2009-10-12 01:01 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, it took me a few years to get the point where I could actually think for myself about things, but I'm confident now that I can make up my own mind without relying on my father or the rest of my family or my friends making up my mind for me. I revel in being independent!

And EWWWWWWWW to your cockroach story. Mine isn't nearly as gross, but it was still gross enough that I remember it from half a lifetime ago (because I was seven or so at the time).

[identity profile] callistahogan.livejournal.com 2009-10-12 01:02 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you! Saying writing is in my blood is probably the best compliment you could ever give me. :D

[identity profile] callistahogan.livejournal.com 2009-10-12 01:06 am (UTC)(link)
I'm sure I will be doing a lot of evolving and learning throughout this competition!

Thank you!

[identity profile] callistahogan.livejournal.com 2009-10-12 01:06 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you! :D

[identity profile] comedychick.livejournal.com 2009-10-12 01:07 am (UTC)(link)
And so you deserve to revel! It is a great thing :D

I think cockroach experiences have a lot of potential to be traumatic enough to be remembered that many years later!

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